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S. I. F. T. COUNSELING & CONSULTATION
JESS DEKKER, MA, LMHCA
Examining the Societal: Internal: Familial: Theological Structures
that inform how we move through our life and relationships
Serving clients in Washington State via telehealth therapy sessions,
and parenting/caregiver coaching nationwide
425.970.9957
Religious Trauma &
Faith Deconstruction at a Glance
Religious trauma refers to the psychological and emotional harm caused by harmful or oppressive religious experiences, including rigid doctrines, spiritual abuse, manipulation, or fear-based teachings. Faith deconstruction is the process of critically examining and questioning one's religious beliefs, often leading to a re-evaluation or departure from the faith. Both religious trauma and faith deconstruction can have profound impacts on individuals, including feelings of guilt, shame, isolation, and identity loss. Those who experience either/both may struggle with anxiety, depression, or spiritual confusion, and may find it difficult to reconcile past beliefs with their evolving worldview, requiring deep emotional and spiritual healing.
When you are working to heal religious trauma and/or are addressing questions about your faith, it can be difficult to find the language that communicates your feelings to someone who may not be familiar with "church jargon." My lived experience with these themes allow me to meet clients where they are at in their processing without requiring them to struggle to convey the burden of the concepts that have shaped them on a cellular and existential levels. Collaboratively, and at the client's pace, we can move towards healing, authenticity, and freedom through solidarity of experiences and trauma-informed care. I strive to give clients the professional support they need and that I didn't have when confronted with the emotional and psychological effects of religious trauma and faith deconstruction. That gap in care I observed in this area was a major catalyst for the work I do.
How Can I Help?
Healing Starts With:
1
Addressing Emotional & Psychological Wounds:
Religious trauma often leaves emotional scars, including feelings of guilt, shame, fear, or unworthiness. Healing requires processing these emotions, to unlearn harmful beliefs and work through the emotional damage caused by fear-based teachings, spiritual abuse, or manipulation.
2
Rebuilding Personal Identity
Religious trauma may have fostered the belief that humans are inherently broken/bad/sinful and fundamentally depraved, and thus they shouldn't listen to or trust themselves. Establishing or rediscovering a sense of self-trust after the loss of identity caused by oppressive and controlling religious doctrines is the center pointe of healing. Recovering involves prioritizing personal autonomy, values, and a sense of self outside the religious framework, often exploring new or more authentic forms of spirituality (or not!), ethics, and self-acceptance.
3
Rebuilding Trust and Healthy Boundaries
Many who experience religious trauma struggle with trust, both in relationships and in institutions, as well as establishing healthy boundaries. Recovery involves learning to set and maintain boundaries, particularly in religious and/or social contexts, and in personal relationships, while developing trust in oneself and in healthier, more balanced interpersonal connections and communities.